I think too much …

I’ve taken some time out lately and haven’t blogged for a while. I’ve been busy and been doing some thinking. I’ve also been really tired lately and not sure why, but I’m finding myself dozing off during the day with A when I settle her for a nap, unless we’re out. I’ve also started writing a book. I won’t give too much away as don’t want to spoil things, even though I don’t know where/if I’m going to take it anywhere yet. I used to write a lot of short stories when I was in my teens but haven’t really done anything since then. It’s something I have thought about doing for a while, but never really been inspired or had an idea for a book. It’s only after reading a book called ‘Diary of a Mummy Misfit’ and it’s sequel ‘The Darker Side of a Mummy Misfit’ and talking to the author, Amanda Egan, on Twitter that encouraged me to go for it. (The books are fab by the way and Amanda is lovely! You can follow her on Twitter @Mummy_Misfit and the books are available on Amazon Kindle and at Lulu.com ) Anyway, after chatting for a bit I mentioned to Amanda about how I’d always fancied writing a book but never knew where to start. Amanda spurred me on and told me to go for it and that it’ll just come to me one day. And you know what? She was right! That evening, a scene played out in my head send I just had to write it down. Since then I’ve been jotting down scenes and them I’ll gel everything together. I’m hoping to have it finished within 6 months. We’ll see!! We’re also still having a lot of issues with J. His medication has been changed so he is eating more in the evening now, but we’re still having issues with him waking in the early hours and helping himself to food that is hidden in the cupboards. We’re at the end of our tethers now as to what to do with him! Parenting is tough, but to through a disability into the mix is even tougher….especially when you have no support. I’m also trying to figure out what I want to do. I quit school at 16 after sitting my GCSE’s and went straight into a full time job. At 19 I went back to night school to study a Higher Access course in Sociology, Psychology and Health. I’m in my late 20s and I still don’t know what I want to do with my life! I had do many hopes and dreams as a youngster. I dreamed of being a Paediatrician or a Lawyer…they’re out of the question. I’d love to write for a living, but I lack confidence in my abilities if being able to produce good work. This blog is ok, I can just ramble here as its my own safe little world. To do it and get paid us a whole different ball game. Then I’d live to run my own business. I did have an idea, but after lots of thinking and talking to people, in now doubting myself (as usual!). So there you are. I have a lot of bumf swashing inside my head right now. I just don’t want to be stuck in the same position a few years down the line. Just need some inspiration or someone to guide me the right way!

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